Walking in Brokenness
One of my dreams has always been to have a butterfly land on me. I LOVE butterflies and know that God is flirting with me whenever one flutters past. When I was in Africa last summer, my dream came true! I had been waiting for years for this moment, and though other butterflies had come close, they were always too busy fluttering around to actually land on me. But this one did. And I know that much of the reason was because it had a broken wing. I learned a lesson about brokenness that day that I will never forget. It’s often in brokenness that God uses us the most.
Today, I write to you hoping to be that broken butterfly. Only I write with a bum knee rather than a broken wing. A month ago I set out to run the 10 miles in my training schedule, but two miles into it, my knee suddenly gave out. I have no idea what happened, but I had to turn around and walk/limp home. But God was in it; I walked in the door at the exact moment a friend needed me to be there. God brought me home early so that one of His hurting children could encounter Him in a profound way and rediscover hope. As I went to bed that night, I thanked Him for my hurt knee; I thanked Him for using my brokenness to touch one of His children.
And now, four days before the race, the brokenness continues. I thought my knee would be better by now. I’ve been doing all my training on the elliptical trainer and bicycle at the gym to give my knee time to heal. It hasn’t been hurting at all when I run on the elliptical trainer, so I assumed it must be healing nicely. But alas, I attempted to run on the road today for the first time and was only half-way down my street when the same pain started shooting through my knee. There was no way I could keep running. I walked home totally bummed out. Even though I ran a half-marathon (13.7 miles) on the elliptical trainer last week, there is no way my body is going to be able to run the actual race this week.
“Lord, what are you up to in all of this?” I asked. And the answer became so clear. “I want you to bring my hope to the children of D.R. Congo through a place of brokenness, not strength. I want you to walk this race, not run it. I want you to identify with the people you are walking for. I am calling you not to run for them, but to walk with them. Not to run in strength to heal their weaknesses, but to enter suffering with them to bring hope from a place of shared weakness. For there is power in weakness and brokenness – My power.”
And so I will walk. I will walk in the footsteps of those who have been left behind in this unfair world. I will walk with those children who are left in last place, watching the rest of the world speed by. I will walk with those who limp forward in brokenness each day with a determination to fight for life despite the hundreds of people passing by every second, leaving them behind in the dust. I will walk with those children in Congo who walk 2 hours every day to get to the ELI school, and then 2 hours home. Some even walk from neighboring countries because it’s their only chance of ever receiving an education. They walk 2 hours for only a few hours of schooling because we don’t have enough classrooms for them to stay all day.
I will walk with those children who also cannot run. Not because of a bum knee, but because of hunger and malaria. But the malnutrition and diseases keep them from much more than running and playing as little kids ought to do. They keep them from being able to sit up in class, care for younger siblings left in their charge, and concentrate enough in class to hear the message that God loves them. The hunger in their bellies, the incessant sound of coughing, and the flashback noises of gunshots often drown out the message being spoken of God’s love and hope.
And so I walk. Walk to buy land for a health clinic to lower the fevers and stop the coughs. Land for more classrooms in which all the children can learn for the entire day and receive daily bread (both physical and spiritual). I walk so these children can know that God is good, that He loves them, and that He has not forgotten them. Walk so that they can meet the Lord walking this broken path with them.
For that is what He does. He doesn’t remove all the brokenness now (the day for that is still coming), but He does enter into our brokenness and walk those roads with us. That’s what He did when He came to Earth. He entered our suffering and walked alongside us in this broken world. And it was through His broken life - His broken body on the cross - that hope, healing, and life became available to us. And I pray that this Saturday, His hope once again comes through brokenness.
To see a video of these children or to help buy this land, go to http://www.empoweringlives.org/run.shtml
Today, I write to you hoping to be that broken butterfly. Only I write with a bum knee rather than a broken wing. A month ago I set out to run the 10 miles in my training schedule, but two miles into it, my knee suddenly gave out. I have no idea what happened, but I had to turn around and walk/limp home. But God was in it; I walked in the door at the exact moment a friend needed me to be there. God brought me home early so that one of His hurting children could encounter Him in a profound way and rediscover hope. As I went to bed that night, I thanked Him for my hurt knee; I thanked Him for using my brokenness to touch one of His children.
And now, four days before the race, the brokenness continues. I thought my knee would be better by now. I’ve been doing all my training on the elliptical trainer and bicycle at the gym to give my knee time to heal. It hasn’t been hurting at all when I run on the elliptical trainer, so I assumed it must be healing nicely. But alas, I attempted to run on the road today for the first time and was only half-way down my street when the same pain started shooting through my knee. There was no way I could keep running. I walked home totally bummed out. Even though I ran a half-marathon (13.7 miles) on the elliptical trainer last week, there is no way my body is going to be able to run the actual race this week.
“Lord, what are you up to in all of this?” I asked. And the answer became so clear. “I want you to bring my hope to the children of D.R. Congo through a place of brokenness, not strength. I want you to walk this race, not run it. I want you to identify with the people you are walking for. I am calling you not to run for them, but to walk with them. Not to run in strength to heal their weaknesses, but to enter suffering with them to bring hope from a place of shared weakness. For there is power in weakness and brokenness – My power.”
And so I will walk. I will walk in the footsteps of those who have been left behind in this unfair world. I will walk with those children who are left in last place, watching the rest of the world speed by. I will walk with those who limp forward in brokenness each day with a determination to fight for life despite the hundreds of people passing by every second, leaving them behind in the dust. I will walk with those children in Congo who walk 2 hours every day to get to the ELI school, and then 2 hours home. Some even walk from neighboring countries because it’s their only chance of ever receiving an education. They walk 2 hours for only a few hours of schooling because we don’t have enough classrooms for them to stay all day.
I will walk with those children who also cannot run. Not because of a bum knee, but because of hunger and malaria. But the malnutrition and diseases keep them from much more than running and playing as little kids ought to do. They keep them from being able to sit up in class, care for younger siblings left in their charge, and concentrate enough in class to hear the message that God loves them. The hunger in their bellies, the incessant sound of coughing, and the flashback noises of gunshots often drown out the message being spoken of God’s love and hope.
And so I walk. Walk to buy land for a health clinic to lower the fevers and stop the coughs. Land for more classrooms in which all the children can learn for the entire day and receive daily bread (both physical and spiritual). I walk so these children can know that God is good, that He loves them, and that He has not forgotten them. Walk so that they can meet the Lord walking this broken path with them.
For that is what He does. He doesn’t remove all the brokenness now (the day for that is still coming), but He does enter into our brokenness and walk those roads with us. That’s what He did when He came to Earth. He entered our suffering and walked alongside us in this broken world. And it was through His broken life - His broken body on the cross - that hope, healing, and life became available to us. And I pray that this Saturday, His hope once again comes through brokenness.
To see a video of these children or to help buy this land, go to http://www.empoweringlives.org/run.shtml
posted by Kierra Higgins at 4:23 PM
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